Why the A.S.S. Method Actually Works

Jasen Eberz, LCSW
Jul 23, 2025
3 min read

Let’s be honest: how many half-baked 3-step methods and trendy coping tips have you seen on Instagram or TikTok? Probably too many to count.

And of the few that seem helpful, how many can you actually recall in the middle of a stress spiral?

That’s why we created the A.S.S. Method — a memorable, evidence-informed tool for real emotional regulation. It’s simple, science-backed, and designed to stick:

👉 Awareness👉 Soothe👉 Step Back

🔎 A = Awareness “How do I experience this in my body?”

The first step in managing your mental health is noticing what’s going on inside. This means tuning into your thoughts, emotions, and — critically — your body sensations.

Why it works:Interoceptive awareness (noticing physical sensations linked to emotions) has been shown to improve emotional clarity and reduce stress responses ➡️ Füstös et al., 2013; NeuroImage

Try this:

Ask yourself what emotion you’re feeling — then ask where you feel it in your body.
Try 60 seconds of deep breathing while observing your body’s response.
Keep a journal of physical cues (tight chest, racing heart, etc.) when stressed.

🧘‍♀️ Mindfulness practices, including journaling and breath work, help train your brain to observe without judging, a skill shown to lower anxiety and boost self-regulation➡️ Khoury et al., 2013; Clinical Psychology Review

💗 S = Soothe

“What do I need right now to feel safe, calm, or supported?”

Once you’ve recognized you’re dysregulated, it’s time to soothe your system — not with avoidance, but with intentional self-compassion.

Why it works:

Self-compassion reduces cortisol, improves heart rate variability (a measure of emotional regulation), and promotes resilience➡️ Neff & Germer, 2013; Journal of Clinical Psychology

Soothing strategies:

Deep belly breathing or box breathing
Holding a warm drink or using a weighted blanket
Listening to calming music or engaging in a gentle hobby
Talking to someone who makes you feel safe

📌 Polyvagal Theory:

(Porges, 2011) explains how these strategies activate the parasympathetic nervous system, shifting you out of "fight/flight" and into safety and connection.

🔁 S = Step Back

“How can I get perspective here?”

Stress shrinks our sense of time and possibility. Stepping back means interrupting that tunnel vision so we can think clearly and choose how to respond.

Why it works:Taking space activates the prefrontal cortex — your brain’s decision- making center. It gives you a chance to reframe the situation and emotionally reset.➡️ Gross, 2002; Psychophysiology

Ways to step back:

Take a 10-minute walk
Change locations (e.g., different room, outdoors)
Write down your thoughts and look for distortions
Practice gratitude or reframe: What else could be true here?

💬 Final Takeaway

The A.S.S. Method might have a funny name — but it’s built on serious science.

✔️ Awareness helps you notice what’s happening✔️ Soothe gives you tools to respond with compassion✔️ Step Back builds space and clarity so you can choose your next move. These aren’t just trendy coping tips — they’re rooted in mindfulness, cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), self-compassion research, and neuroscience.

Download your copy of the method here !

📚 Research Sources

Füstös, J., Gramann, K., Herbert, B. M., & Pollatos, O. (2013). On the embodiment of emotion regulation: Interoceptive awareness facilitates reappraisal. NeuroImage, 83, 682–690. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neuroimage.2013.07.026
Khoury, B., Lecomte, T., Fortin, G., et al. (2013). Mindfulness-based therapy: A comprehensive meta-analysis. Clinical Psychology Review, 33(6), 763–771. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2013.05.005
Neff, K. D., & Germer, C. K. (2013). A pilot study and randomized controlled trial of the mindful self‐compassion program. Journal of Clinical Psychology, 69(1), 28–44. https://doi.org/10.1002/jclp.21923
Gross, J. J. (2002). Emotion regulation: Affective, cognitive, and social consequences. Psychophysiology, 39(3), 281–291. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0048577201393198
Porges, S. W. (2011). The Polyvagal Theory: Neurophysiological Foundations of Emotions, Attachment, Communication, and Self-regulation. W. W. Norton & Company.